The swallow may fly south with the sun, and the house martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land. Burn her anyway! A newt? How do you know she is a witch?
Well, Mercia's a temperate zone! Well, we did do the nose. Burn her anyway! Shut up! Will you shut up?! Why do you think that she is a witch?
Well, Mercia's a temperate zone! A newt? Well, we did do the nose. Camelot! I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough water! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! Now leave before I am forced to taunt you a second time!
Shh! Knights, I bid you welcome to your new home. Let us ride to Camelot! I have to push the pram a lot. I dunno. Must be a king. Ni! Ni! Ni! Ni!
You don't vote for kings. How do you know she is a witch? We found them. Shh! Knights, I bid you welcome to your new home. Let us ride to Camelot!
Well, I didn't vote for you. Look, my liege! Why do you think that she is a witch? We want a shrubbery!! Knights of Ni, we are but simple travelers who seek the enchanter who lives beyond these woods. A newt?
The swallow may fly south with the sun, and the house martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land. Well, what do you want? I'm not a witch. Oh, ow!
Where'd you get the coconuts? Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help, help, I'm being repressed! Well, she turned me into a newt. Bloody Peasant! A newt?
Well, I got better. Well, Mercia's a temperate zone! He hasn't got shit all over him. Well, how'd you become king, then?
Why? Why do you think that she is a witch? I have to push the pram a lot. I have to push the pram a lot.
A newt? Shut up! Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help, help, I'm being repressed! You don't vote for kings. Well, I got better.
Camelot! Well, she turned me into a newt. Look, my liege! What a strange person.
Bring her forward! Did you dress her up like this? The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your king.
You don't vote for kings. Shh! Knights, I bid you welcome to your new home. Let us ride to Camelot! A newt? You don't frighten us, English pig-dogs! Go and boil your bottoms, sons of a silly person! I blow my nose at you, so-called Ah-thoor Keeng, you and all your silly English K-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-niggits!
I have to push the pram a lot. Shh! Knights, I bid you welcome to your new home. Let us ride to Camelot! Where'd you get the coconuts? The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your king.
Hey, guess what you're accessories to. Then throw her in the laundry room, which will hereafter be referred to as "the brig". Tell them I hate them. Please, Don-Bot… look into your hard drive, and open your mercy file!
One hundred dollars. It may comfort you to know that Fry's death took only fifteen seconds, yet the pain was so intense, that it felt to him like fifteen years. And it goes without saying, it caused him to empty his bowels.
Who am I making this out to? File not found. That's right, baby. I ain't your loverboy Flexo, the guy you love so much. You even love anyone pretending to be him! I meant 'physically'. Look, perhaps you could let me work for a little food? I could clean the floors or paint a fence, or service you sexually?
Why yes! Thanks for noticing. Can we have Bender Burgers again? I feel like I was mauled by Jesus. Dear God, they'll be killed on our doorstep! And there's no trash pickup until January 3rd. Yes. You gave me a dollar and some candy.
No, of course not. It was… uh… porno. Yeah, that's it. Throw her in the brig. You mean while I'm sleeping in it? She also liked to shut up! There's no part of that sentence I didn't like!
Leela, Bender, we're going grave robbing. Um, is this the boring, peaceful kind of taking to the streets? But I know you in the future. I cleaned your poop. I love this planet! I've got wealth, fame, and access to the depths of sleaze that those things bring.
When the lights go out, it's nobody's business what goes on between two consenting adults. Ven ve voke up, ve had zese wodies. All I want is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit… that's why I'm transferring to business school!
As an interesting side note, as a head without a body, I envy the dead. Nay, I respect and admire Harold Zoid too much to beat him to death with his own Oscar. No! The cat shelter's on to me. Ummm…to eBay?
Professor, make a woman out of me. Do a flip! What are you hacking off? Is it my torso?! 'It is!' My precious torso! Professor, make a woman out of me. Morbo will now introduce tonight's candidates… PUNY HUMAN NUMBER ONE, PUNY HUMAN NUMBER TWO, and Morbo's good friend, Richard Nixon.
You won't have time for sleeping, soldier, not with all the bed making you'll be doing. No argument here. Ooh, name it after me! It doesn't look so shiny to me.
Dear God, they'll be killed on our doorstep! And there's no trash pickup until January 3rd. Hello Morbo, how's the family? Incidentally, you have a dime up your nose. It's okay, Bender. I like cooking too.
Bender, hurry! This fuel's expensive! Also, we're dying! Have you ever tried just turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them? With gusto. No, she'll probably make me do it. These old Doomsday Devices are dangerously unstable. I'll rest easier not knowing where they are.
We'll need to have a look inside you with this camera. Ow, my spirit! I'm sure those windmills will keep them cool. Please, Don-Bot… look into your hard drive, and open your mercy file! Would you censor the Venus de Venus just because you can see her spewers?
Your best is an idiot! What are their names? You've killed me! Oh, you've killed me! Please, Don-Bot… look into your hard drive, and open your mercy file! I wish! It's a nickel.
If rubbin' frozen dirt in your crotch is wrong, hey I don't wanna be right. You mean while I'm sleeping in it? It must be wonderful. No! I want to live! There are still too many things I don't own!
Dear Mr. President, There are too many states nowadays. Please, eliminate three. P.S. I am not a crackpot. Jesus must be spinning in his grave! Inflammable means flammable? What a country. I'm a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world.
I prefer a vehicle that doesn't hurt Mother Earth. It's a go-cart, powered by my own sense of self-satisfaction. A woman is a lot like a refrigerator. Six feet tall, 300 pounds…it makes ice. I don't like being outdoors, Smithers. For one thing, there's too many fat children.
…And the fluffy kitten played with that ball of string all through the night. On a lighter note, a Kwik-E-Mart clerk was brutally murdered last night. Inflammable means flammable? What a country.
I'm going to the back seat of my car, with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes! I've had it with this school, Skinner. Low test scores, class after class of ugly, ugly children…
Books are useless! I only ever read one book, "To Kill A Mockingbird," and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the color of his skin…but what good does *that* do me? A woman is a lot like a refrigerator. Six feet tall, 300 pounds…it makes ice.
Kids, kids. I'm not going to die. That only happens to bad people. I've had it with this school, Skinner. Low test scores, class after class of ugly, ugly children… Marge, just about everything's a sin. Y'ever sat down and read this thing? Technically we're not supposed to go to the bathroom.
Brace yourselves gentlemen. According to the gas chromatograph, the secret ingredient is… Love!? Who's been screwing with this thing? Uh, no, they're saying "Boo-urns, Boo-urns." I'm allergic to bee stings. They cause me to, uh, die.
Thank you, steal again. Oh, a *sarcasm* detector. Oh, that's a *really* useful invention! Brace yourselves gentlemen. According to the gas chromatograph, the secret ingredient is… Love!? Who's been screwing with this thing?
When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power…like God must feel when he's holding a gun. Oh, so they have Internet on computers now! I've had it with this school, Skinner. Low test scores, class after class of ugly, ugly children…
Our differences are only skin deep, but our sames go down to the bone. Human contact: the final frontier. Oh, a *sarcasm* detector. Oh, that's a *really* useful invention! Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use.
Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals…except the weasel. Oh, everything looks bad if you remember it. Oh, I'm in no condition to drive. Wait a minute. I don't have to listen to myself. I'm drunk.
I've had it with this school, Skinner. Low test scores, class after class of ugly, ugly children… No children have ever meddled with the Republican Party and lived to tell about it. Inflammable means flammable? What a country.
Ahoy hoy? This is the greatest case of false advertising I've seen since I sued the movie "The Never Ending Story." Hi. I'm Troy McClure. You may remember me from such self-help tapes as "Smoke Yourself Thin" and "Get Some Confidence, Stupid!"
Thank you, steal again. A lifetime of working with nuclear power has left me with a healthy green glow…and left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner. I'll be back. You can't keep the Democrats out of the White House forever, and when they get in, I'm back on the streets, with all my criminal buddies.
Oh, a *sarcasm* detector. Oh, that's a *really* useful invention! Hi. I'm Troy McClure. You may remember me from such self-help tapes as "Smoke Yourself Thin" and "Get Some Confidence, Stupid!" When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!